Today I stray away from writing the Fiction within this blog and going to the pains of writing Fiction. This has been one of my realest posts I've posted in a while, the last one being the one about Paramore. I COULD just post this up in The Daily Baggage, but let's be honest. No one reads shit from that so its pretty much dead haha.
So thus begin the first entry into my journey of Fiction.
Don't let the title fool you. I LOVE writing stories. They're the only thing I've got going for me.
But even if you love what you do, you'll eventually come to a point where you get frustrated and unsatisfied with what you've done. Despite it being what you really want to do.
I'm a college student, and college students tend to either be lax or really REALLY busy. I'm one of those people in between. I don't study enough to overachieve, but I don't neglect myself to score mediocre below averages. I've got my highs and lows and I've got enough free time.
The first thing you think about writing, career wise, is that it doesn't seem like such a life sustaining career. It's a gamble. Will you sell hard like Veronica Roth? Or will you vanish into thin air?
I've always thought of being a Novelist from just when I was a wee Sophomore in High School. Back then, I treated it as a joke though. I didn't seriously get into books until I was a Junior. After watching Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows Part 2, I wouldn't shut up about it and so my Oldest Sister challenged me to read all 7 of them(I'm proud to say I finished them all within a week. Granted, I stopped paying attention in class to finish her books.)
What sealed the deal was when a friend of mine lent me her copy of Hush, Hush by Becca Fitzpatrick. It's now my Favorite Book Series.
After the day I finished Hush, Hush, I dug up the notebook I used to write and doodle(Yes, it was originally a semi comic, semi story) the story and got in front of my laptop to start writing it. I enjoyed it. I enjoyed every single keystroke.
It wasn't until I was in Chapter 3 and a senior that I started to neglect the story. I must have been heavily distracted. If I still had ADHD, I'd probably never get past chapter 4.
I resumed it in College, doing whatever I could to continue. Tragedy struck when my laptop was stolen. Damn that asshole.
I had to restart with what little I had. What little I managed to save in my sister's old laptop.
So I rebuilt in from the ground up, and there I realized a lot of mistakes I did before. Sometimes a tragedy is also a blessing. When I lost my laptop, I gained a stronger will to continue, and a New Good Friend who listened to me go on and on about the Laptop I lost. She's such an amazing person.
Now I go to concentration. I'm proud to say I'm currently on Chapter 18 of my first novel. I never thought I'd reach a number after 7 actually since the laptop that was stolen had up until only chapter 5.
I'm a guy and a geek. I immensely enjoy watching TV Series and playing Video Games.
My laptop is loaded with games and shows. And I have a PS4, so that's another thing.
There's always this point in writing my chapters that I'd stop and grab the nearest fun thing and just do that instead. In other words, I get bored.
Which is weird. When I get back to it, it doesn't seem boring as it was a few hours ago.
That leads to this entry's final point.
The heart. To write something, you must have an idea. The story in itself, I made when I was a naive High Schooler who was heavily influenced by Kingdom Hearts and Final Fantasy.
Now, its more than just a scribble in a notebook. It's my pride and soul.
This story is what I plan to gamble my life with. But there's a problem... Even in real life, people experience this. You can't express what's in the heart.
As one can't express their feelings, I can't express the heart of the story or what's going to happen in the right words. It gets to me.
Same for all the unfinished stories in this blog. There are a lot of them that are incomplete, no?
That's just it.
I know what's going to happen... I just can't say it out loud.
Well that's all for today's woes and stuff.
I'm Thanos Venge.
Today's song is Now by Paramore.
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