Diagnosis of Free Falling

There were words that I used to say
And things I used to do
Just enough to make me smile
And just enough to make me go on with my life

I can't remember what they were
Nor can I remember when I've smiled truthfully
Because the last time I did I think I still liked myself
I can't remember the last time I thought that either

I sat for hours looking for a reason
Something to make me believe in that innocence
In that pride that made me walk tall
And those dreams that keep me alive

It made me miss the feeling of being Naive
To senselessly chase after something to prove a point
But time isn't a very nice person, you see
And he takes away the filters for you to see the truth

So in the 21 years I live
I learned to smile just enough to make people believe
That I wasn't ever empty inside
And I live now, trying to look for something to fill this hole up
Because I don't want to be empty inside anymore